Hi Reader,

I want to say something plainly today, because it sounds backwards until you've lived it: peace can be the trigger.
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If you've never been inside an unhealthy relationship, that probably confuses you. Peace is supposed to be the relief. The reward. The thing you worked so hard to reach.
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But if calm always came right before the punishment — the sudden rage, the silent treatment, the fight that came out of nowhere — your body learned a different lesson. Calm became the warning light. So now, when life finally gets good, you don't relax. You brace. You scan. You wait for the other shoe to drop.
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And then something even stranger happens: chaos starts to feel safer than peace. Chaos is known. Chaos is familiar. And familiar feels like safety to a nervous system — even when it's the thing that harmed you.
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So you leave.
You find something healthy.
And the calm feels boring.
Flat.
Wrong.
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And before you even realize what you're doing, you stir it up — a fight over nothing, a test, a little drama. Not because you want pain. Because your body is reaching for the only version of safe it recognizes.
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Hear me on this: you are not self-sabotaging. You are not broken. You are a nervous system doing exactly what it was trained to do.
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And here is the part that changes everything — boredom isn't the problem. Boredom is just what safety feels like to a body that never had it. Safety can be relearned, one calm moment at a time.
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Try this the next time things are okay and your body braces anyway: hand on your chest, name it out loud. "Things are okay right now, and my body is bracing to protect me."
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Breathe into it. Stay with the quiet moment instead of fleeing it or breaking it apart.
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Sometimes peace is just peace. And you are allowed to let it be.
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If this landed for you, I'd love to hear it — just reply to this email.
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And if there's a woman in your life who needs to hear that she's not broken for bracing at the good things, forward this to her.
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With love,
Corissa
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P.S. — only if you want it in: the eBook of The Savvy Girl's Guide is still $3.99 at Barnes & Noble, but the promotion ends today! So grab your copy or one for a friend below.

P.P.S. If you prefer a physical copy, the paperback is currently on sale on Amazon for 30% off and includes 90 days free of Amazon Music! (link is below my signature card)

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